Doned with all my werk. I finish up HEWLETT PACKARD, COB, PRE-ALERT. Well what else to say work getting lessed day by day. Just pray that our position here still stay input. Vey damed bored at work, how i wish im in the other shift so that i can be with rita, kak zahara & maryam. But too bad me n maryam can never be in the same shift. What else abt work, oh yea we have to clear 35% of our leave within this month itslef. What@#$%^%$@!! dats mean i have to clear at least 7 days of my anual leave not including childcare leave this 1 month. Haiyo!!! K 1st reason maybe they want us to clear our leave now as the business is slow, or 2nd if they want to fired us then they dont have to payus so much leave wat. Rite?? Hmmm like i say no one can gurantine if next month, next week or tomorrow we still in UPS. Whatever it is. I believe in Allah, everthing that happen with HIS wills. N if its happen then it means HE have better job for me somewhere else. I lOVE YOU MY ALLAH..

After work going off to JB with hubby, princess & mom. I tot of getting balqis her swimsuits there. Im going to swimming complex on Monday with rita. So better preapared early.

Haizz i got something to announce actually but just wait till monday. But to some of my dear frens they already know. I just want to confirm and then i announce it. Just pray for me.

Enjoy below poem for all expecting Moms!!
At first you moved,
only a little.
I could always find you,
right in the middle.
As time went on,
you really started to grow.
It wasn't a whole lot,
in fact, it was rather slow.
Before I knew it,
you were all over the place.
It kind of felt like,
you were running a race.
People would ask me,
if you were a boy or a girl.
I would sit and wonder,
if you would have curls.
There are so many things,
I really want to know.
But,
you are hidden inside,
so the answers don't show.
How much will you weigh?
How tall will you be?
What color is your hair?
Will you even like me?
I hope and pray,
you feel like you belong.
I never want you to feel,
like you are alone.
Your Dad and I,
planned you from the start.
You, my dear child,
were made straight from our hearts.
In about a month or so,
I'll meet you, for the first time.
For you are the product,
of your Dad's love and mine.
There will be no one like you,
not any place in the world.
It really doesn't matter,
if you are a boy or a girl.
We are both so happy,
that you even exist.
The gender doesn't matter.
you'll be hard to resist.
I hope I make you proud,
that I am your mother everyday.
Because,
you have filled my dreams,
in more ways,
than words can say.
It won't be long before,
I can look you in the eyes.
I can feel the excitement growing,
I know I'm going to cry.
Don't worry my angel,
those tears will be of joy.
It won't matter to me,
if you are a girl or a boy.
I missed my sista. My old Changkat Changi gerl frens, my MPH crazy gerls.. I miss it so much. I miss the laughter, the quarrel, i miss the hang out, i miss the enjoyment, i miss the clubbing, i miss the Diva night,.. I miss everthing abt our moment spent together. If only i can turn the clock back, i wish to stay in the age a little more longer so i can enjoy and precious the time i had with you gerls.
My School time, i still remember where the six of us will sit in a corner of library then gosip, laugh, talk abt boys, we are like some kind of BIG SISTA in the school. Then Ning with her make up on even at school, ainun with her non stop talking, zarimah, sumarni, siti mardiana (hahaha) , my bestfrend also like my sister noriza and me. (Noi, u still remember kan) The six sista. Its really fun. Also in my mind the time we ran from lesson. Trying hard to climb over the gate. Hahaha luckly never get hook up there. After school i werk at MPH, I bring along noriza and Ning. 3 of us in mph, there i meet minah, nirwana, wani, kak dayang, all other crazy babes..

Thats was so much fun. Although i quarrel alot with Noriza because of other mouth but still i did enjoy the moment. When the gap happen between me n noi, i got attached with minah. We grew closer day by day. She's too like a sister to me. Minah if you read this i really miss you so much.
Until then one by one our frens start to resign there is when the beginning of our distant. We move on with our own life.

The distant grew deeper where we all lost contact to each other. Till today when i type this i feel like crying, feel like laughing, smiling.. Its a mixture feeling. No matter wat our past is i appreciate every little thing u gerls have share with me.

I thanks Allah for giving me chance to meet YOU ALL GERLS to the path of my life.
Just got news from my mom few minutes ago, my grandma in critical stage. She's in hospital now. Not sure when to visit her. She not feeling well for the past few weeks already, but she refuse to consult doctor. Haizzz if only she went earlier. She dont have to admit i guess. Just pray for my grandma.
I just dont understand why some people just dont noe wat they want in life? My dear brother, he is my only brother. Of course i love him. But pity him. He dont love himself. He have no goal in life. I just dont noe what his purpose of living? Go out at night, come back in the morning, sleep until evening, wake up only face the pc , chatting knowing gerls thru there. Den go out again. He keep on changing his gerlfren ( im not supposed to call them his gerlfren) mayb one night stand gerl. I noe its not nice to say that, but that is what my brother been treated them. I pity them actually they love my brother whole heartly but the truth is he never ever stick to one gerl even for one day. That is the fact. Gerls out there this is the TRUTH!!! Is still up to you gerls to believe it or not. Pls dont make yourself fool and commit to him, cause i noe him very well he still not commit to anyone of you yet. He still want to enjoy life. Which i guess he is wasting his life with unnessary things. I pity with some of the gerls i noe from him. They are all nice gerls, i did advise to some of them but i guess they trust my bro more then me. Well... love is blind or maybe they are blinded by my bro. Well that his life, i dont want to get involved so much.

If you happen to read this bro, just to tell you Pls change n be a responsible person. You are my only brother. I dont anything bad to happen to you despite you have make me quite miserable in life, with loan everywhere surrounded me. I still want the best for you.
I still remember how much you suffer in life. How much you have to face the world alone without mom loves, without dad loves. Everyone hates you, no house to leave, Hari raya season was trow out from your very own house by our step dad. You was beaten till half dead by step dad just because u took $2 from your mom wallet n the money is for you to eat. I noe you are hungry. I dtill remember that. The reason behind your failure in life in ONE PERSON, but pls he already old. Pls forget abt it n change yourself to the better. You making life worst by rebelling the past.

They may not noe you, they may curse you, but you cant blame them u treating them like animal. You cant continue hurting the gerls out there. Karma will happen someday. Believe me my dear brother. I dont to see you suffer again. Pls ammend your ways. Plsss listen to me. I love you so much. Pls change ....
I msg hazli yesterday,..

me : bang Happy Valentine's Day

Hazli : Abeh kenaper?

me: Tak lah wish jer.

Hazli: Nak malam k...

Hahahaha he so cute. Anyway baby thats msg its for you. Everyday is our valentine day kan. LOVE YOU SO MUCH. Thks for everthing.

I kind of miss her. Quite awhile i hav not chat with her. Hope you're doing fine. I may not have the time to spend with you during your stay in singapore. Im just tight with work n family. Whenever i try to close with you is either my mom or bro wIll stare at us. So thats is the cause of our distant i guess. Anyway just take care of yourself. N enjoy life.
Just came back from my lunch. Had a very nice and cosy lunch with a bautiful SEA view!!! Me, rita, kak zahara & kak rina had lots of fun actually. We try to boost kak rina up. Cause she is very down. Our company lost 2nd major customer. Totally lost. N kak rina in handling that customer. So what i heard her team gonna do operation... No shift, permanet AM. Hmmm really bad recession huh!! What to do just have to pray hard for our position. Now they are going after the MC queen. Whoever exceed or frequently took mc must personally meet MARY YEO our big boss . They really go into a very minor things. And that very litlle things can be their reason to dump us.

Back to our lunch topic, we had our lunch by the sea. Packet ayam penyet n drinks den straight to the changi beach. Very windy. Had alot of laugh. At least released bit of our worriness. Ok den back to work before any one caught me blogging.

My Brother fren with Baby Balqis...
This is for Maryam & Dwi.. You guys love baby kan.. Then watch n enjoy!!



I got 2 weeks child mc. Its not necessary for me actually, cause UPS doesnt have any child mc. Only child care leave. But today i have no choice but to apply for child care leave. My mom sick. Her hand swollen. If i just ignored n go to work wat happen to balqis. Actually i already inform my supervisor on Friday itself that i might be taking leave on monday if Balqis still in KKH. So im still taking leave for another reason. So the whole day at home, i do all the housework, plus cooking, plus cloth washing, hanging cloth and all abt cloh lah. PLUS... o look after balqis the whole day. Tiring but fun.

There is something bothering me actually. There is someone says this behind me " Sikit2 hantar anak gi hospital, macam takde cara lain pula"
So listen here what im going to

NAK TUNGGU ANAK AKU DAH NAK MAMPUS BARU NAK HANTAR GI HOSPITAL, YANG HANTAR PUN MAK AKU, PAKAI DUIT AKU, TAK MENYUSAH KAN KORANG. TAK SATU SEN PUN PAKAI DUIT KORANG. JADI TAK PAYAH NAK CAKAP PASAL HAL AKU. KORANG PATUT BERTERIMAH KASIH SEKURANG KURANG NYA BALQIS SELAMAT TAK ADE APER2 N SEPATUTNYE TERIMAH KASIH DENGAN MAK AKU WALAUPUN DIA SORANG DAN SAKIT DIA MASIH MAMPU HANTAR BALQIS GI HOSPITAL. TAKLAH PANDAI2 NAK BUAT BENDA YANG DIA TAK TAHU. KALAU APER2 JADI PADA BALQIS MAK AKU TAK BUAT APER2 TETAP KORANG SALAH KAN MAK AKU JUGA KAN!!!

SO HEAR IT OUT YOU BITHCES, ITS MY FAMILY, DONT FUCKING BOTHER ABT IT, N DONT FUCKING ACT AS IF YOU CARE ABT MY FAMILY. IDIOT YOU HAVE YOUR OWN FAMILY N YOU TOO HAVE A TODDLER , SO LETS KARMA TAKE IT PLACE.
Balqis admitted to KKH ward 7504 on friday dur to Urine infection. The urine is so cloudy that need her to be warded for further investigation. Her urine was send for lab test. It sound so serious at first cause it very rare for a toddler like balqis age to get urine infection. What doctor concern is only abt the urine which is so cloudy it might be Kidney problem which can lead to Kidney Failure. I feel like to faint when i heard the explanation from Dr Nancy. Other posibility is maybe normal urine infection due to virus of enviroment or the food n milk that balqis had.

Alhamdulilah the next day, which is Sat early morning doc came n told me nothing to worry abt, urine test show balqis kidney is funtioning very well, only a normal infection. Thanks Allah. Thanks.. May i get all the sickness but please not my little princess. Since her urine is fine i ask to be discharge the same day. She only can be realesed ard 5pm. Reach home ard 615pm.

Tot of going for early bed, but have to forget abt that. My mother in law anf gang visited us.
Finally i slept ard 1am..
I received a call from my mom ard 2+pm. Just after i came back from lunch. Shocking like wat. Its my mom. She told me Balqis sunddenly fall sick, hight fever, vomit, n the balck eye ball roll up. Only the white eyes can been seen. I feel like fainted.... My heart beat very fast, luckly i got no heart problem if not ah... Game liou!Aniway, i force my mom to bring balqis to KKH, I call my sister to help mom. So she so fast seh, 5 mins she in the cab take mom n balqis den off to KKH. Reach there abt 2.45pm. Balqis state quite bad as mention by my sister. She close her eyes, but not sleeping. She just dont feel like to see the surrounding. Me at werk tak tentu arah, nak balik takde orang nak cover, kak rina pun takde. HP semua belum buat. Ya'Allah only HE noe how i feel inside. I cant control myself but to cry at the corner. I call2 hazli cannot go thru. Hazli go friday prayer n forget to switch on back his mobile. I get hold on him ard 3pm. Den i feel a bit released after talking to him. He told me he call my sister n balqis a bit better. Open up her eyes, n being herself already.

I ask my mom wat happen, how it happen, when it happen.. Mom told me she told balqis to HDB the got one of this makci sudeendly from no where go to balqis n say " GEMUK NYE BUDAK NIE, CANTIK PULA TU, BADAN BESAR, MAKAN BERAS APER!!! "" kan mulut taik ayam tu. So its kinf of terkene mata kot. I dunno if you guys believe it or not. But i guess its true.

Anyway rushing to fetch hazli n straight to KKH. No updates abt my princess yet..
I received sms from Ainun, it goes like this.

Ainun: Hie Hawa,... This Sat kau dapat jumpe kite semua kat simei, cuz aku nak tgk anak kau tu mesti cute.....

Hawa: Siape2 yang ade.

Ainun:Aku, Halim, Firdaus, Zarima,Mardiana, sumarni n maybe noriza jugak,

Hawa: Ok lah boleh, kau confirm aku time k.

Ainun: Ok sure n btw sekarang kau keje mane.

N bla bla bla abt my work place. So how should i go or not?? Confrim giler dorang terkejut tengok aku kan. 1st dah gemuk, 2nd, HAWA PAKAI TUDUNG!!!! Hawa yang dorang kenal dulu very the wild seh. Tapi manusia kan berubah. Im very proud of what i am now. Althought tak lah glamour ker, jambu giler ker, kaya giler ker, ape2 lah. Im just happy with wat i am now. With my husband n my princess. Im looking forward for the meeting actually. Tapi macam jam gitu, nak cakap aper? Nak berbual aper? Hawa tak boleh giler macam time sekolah dulu per. So how?

Maybe i should ask noriza along. Then i wont feel too awkward. Should bring our husband along as well. Hmmm hope it gonna be fun!
Days pass so fast. Its bees a few days last i update my blog. So many things happen n it happen so fast. That past saturday was really a shocking sat. It actually goes like this, im on leave on Fri(30th Jan 09), packed hazli stuff for him to go KL. Ard 4pm hazli kol that he hav to cancel the KL trip because he have to fly to Jakarta for business trip as instructed by his boss. He have no other choices but to except it.


To cut the story short hazli kol me at ard 3+pm on sat to packed our stuff, (me, balqis & mom) and off to KL. It really happen very fast. I reach JB ard 5pm and we reach KL 7.30pm. No stops!!! Imagine that. Oh sorry, he only stop at Paggor to go toilets. Den guess who we saw???


Daaaaa!!!
Arash... Fav Actor!!!

He soo cool. So humble , so hendsem... n he hav a ver sweet wife too. Beside him is my mother lah of course she the most kecoh... We took a few picture tapi blur lah. This is the best i can put. He too on the way back toKL from batu pahat. Ade jemputan katanye. Ish ish hensem nye. Terbayang bayang seh. After dat short excitment, we drove all straight to KL. Reach kak long house ard 8+pm. Den go to pengantin house, That night i went to karaoke with hazli n the gang. I guess a total of 10 men n i am the only gerls...Fuyooo... Hehehe alah semua sedara lah. Abg2 hazli n sepupu hazli. Best giler. I really enjoy myself, cause i never hav the chance to go out wheneven i go KL. Cause i hav to look after Balqis. Since my mom follow, aper lagi ambil kesempatan lah hawa. After karaoke we went to late supper. Eat prata, den i saw i another malaysia artist i forget his name but he is 70an singer. Hahaha.

The next day morning we went to Selayang Market, best juga. Banyak barang murah2. But too bad nak kene budjet pasal tak bawa enough cash. I bought selendang, kasut, most of the thing is balqis things. Dats it abt the pasar. Back hom, den ard 1pm we pack our stuff n off to pengantin house. We left the pengantin house to Busu melah house, den we supposed to back SINGAPORE. But this abg ude wife (kak nora) want to eat kupang at MALAKA, so he bring us all to MALAKA. Punye lah dalam tempat dia. Kita jalan dari MALAKA kul 10pm tak giler tu. Tapi enjoy juga lah. Den our way back hom kereta blakang drive by one of hazli brother saw "that things" flying. Eeee. Seram,..

Finally we reach singapore at 4am. Wash up, den Zzzzzz... Panjang lebar cerita aku. Takper overall ENJOY!!!